When I Close My Eyes

When I close my eyes

I see us walking side by side

I see your eyes loving and looking at

every part of my face

my eyes, my lips,

as I am loving looking

back, at every part

of yours

When I close my eyes

I feel your heart beating

against mine

as you press up 

against me

beating with passion

I feel so loved

and wanted and loved

When I close my eyes

I see your skin, so brown

I see every hair

dancing across your face

your lips,

every line

every flaw

I see your eyes and they

are saying something beautiful

and sweet

When I close my eyes

June 2015

The Diary

He stood in front of me. All I wanted to do was look in his eyes and tell him, show him how much I cared. But instead I did nothing and did not even look at his handsome, beautiful face.

Instead, I walked outside and tried to get as far away as I could so I could cry forever. The worst pain I could think of was not having him in my life. Love undone is killing me.

When he looks at me, it's with disdain as if it were my fault that he fell in love with me and we, we could never be. Is it my fault that he'll love me until the bitter, last breath, dying end? Or that he'll live in this limbo with me unable to see where we're going nor him either as we tumble down the rabbit hole wondering if we'll ever find our sanity, if we'll ever touch the ground again.

I could sink into his beautiful eyes and stay there forever.

I've fallen somehow, can't find my feet, can't find the ground. Lost forever. I still think of him and wonder if it will ever end.. 

May 2015

The Summer House

It's the way we were

on that lovely day

that I was so inclined to think

there would never be another way

sun dancing 'cross the water

dipping in the sand

you and I together walking 

hand in hand

You were happy then

our dreams built on so much hope

go ahead and lie to me now

now that your gone and I've

nothing left to cope

I dream of those days

and wish somehow I could

bring them back again

but the good memories fade

and I am reminded

that was when

We lived there - 

on the most deserted beach

that summer house

and you and me ~

May 2015